HIDE your face (kyonomiko) wrote,
HIDE your face
kyonomiko

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Am I still as beautiful as I was in heaven? I know you'll say yes...

There's an art contest in Amano's world. I don't know if I should compete or not. I want to... but I really don't think I have it in me. It's supposed to be a quick 2 week competition. Draw somthing. Draw your best. Then, everyone from the forum will judge your peice. THey vote on the ones they like best.. prize will be somthing.. It hasn't been announced. There are rumors that Amano himself may critique your peice. Sounds scary.. hmmm. I have an idea for a peice planned out. I want to draw somthing with depth that'll draw you into the picture. I have a few scribbles now.. but I'm really unsure of myself. There judging will be in two categories: Power& execution. In short, The person that best conveys a message w/their peice, and the person who has the most technical skill. There is no particular topic, and really no other restriction. So.. The challenge now is for me to find a way to make what I want. I don't know why I feel that this is so important for me. Maybe deep down, I'm trying to proove myself in that forum again when I said I wouldn't. It's a community of people.. most of them 5 years younger than me.. who tear apart what you do. I don't mind some crit, as long as they have suggestions for improvement. You never know.. they may see somthing I don't.. But most often, the peices I'm the most proud of are the ones they tear apart.. and the ones I think are crap are the ones they latch on to. Go figure. So.. I suppose you can say I'm almost afraid of making somthing I may be proud in, because it's almost certain they'll hate it. On the other hand... if I make crap, I'll be too ashamed to post it.. and it could have been somthing that would have won. Winning really isn't that important.. but I Don't know why I feel so motivated to do well. The sh*tty part is.. I don't like the guy that suggested the contest.. I don't like a lot of the people that will be competing.. and I don't like the lack of restrictions. I know it sounds silly.. but give me some limits.. I can work withing limits.. I've been doing it so long I don't know if I can do anything else. Maybe that's another reason why this is so frightening. I know that to win, I'll have to take a risk and draw somthing out of my "comfort zone." I want to do that, but it's tough. I havne't really learned much in the past month (art-wise) that helps me correct my style and move on.. Damn.. I really just need a good anatomy book.
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