April 24th, 2001


My Life in the Rivers of Disbelief

I'm disbeleiving! I'm disbeleiving!
Ashura-um.. san... maybe kun? >..< Damn CLAMP.
I've been kind of depressed today. Classes are getting pretty stressfull. Tonight, (I keep forgetting about this part) I have to write my lab report for Biology.. I need to revise my English paper... though I think that can wait until tomorrow morning before class.. (and perhaps the last part of the bio paper as well..heh) But I also need to empty the cat litter and straighten things up around here.
I'm dreading tomorrow.. 2 essays due, and I have to work, to boot. The worst thing about that is this: Everytime we have a break, they swap the weekends. It's not a big deal when you have nothing to do with your weekends.. but when I say "I want to work every other weekend" I mean it. I don't like it when they swap, because that messes my schedule up, and I end up having to swap weekends again. It's the worlds largest pain in the butt.. But I digress...
We had Easter weekend off. They closed down the dorms. They switched my weekends. I would normally be working this weekend, and not last weekend. I checked the answering machine yesterday, and there were angry messages from work on my machine from Sat. They had it on the schedule that I was supposed to work. I swear.. I just want to quit. I can't take it anymore.. that and the paycheck sitation is driving me up the wall. That messed up my yesterday, pretty much. I stayed up intil 3 am last night... had to wake up at 6:30 this morning for my bid Debate (I think it went ok) and went to sex class.. came home.. played a new game...and became utterly depressed.
We bought Black&White. It's supposed to be really good.. and I like it.. except it's a but tough for me to control, and I get mostion-sick from the simulated 3-d environment. They have polygons shifting on them or somthing.. it makes me dizzy..
And I don't get email anymore, apparently. It's not like a technical malefunction.. I just haven't been getting much mail. I have nothing to do on the net now. And without anything to do on the net, I really don't have anything to do period. Sure.. I have all these games.. but the net is my only chance for somewhat normal human interaction when I'd normally have none.
I have half a bottle of really potent plum wine left. I think I'm going to drink it all tonight. I read a survey once that said if you drink when you're alone, you're an alcoholic, because normal people apparently only drink socially. If I drink it all, all by myself, does that make me an alcoholic, depressed, or a depressed alcoholic? I think having a glass of wine (you can hardly callt his stuff wine, though) by yourself is hardly alchoholism.. ::shruggs:; Pick a malady.. any malady
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    Enigma- (I'm TRYING to relax...yeah, right..) Between Mind&